My name is Jessie Walters. I'm 28 years old, married to the love of my life, have two awesome dogs, and a great job. I think that most people would love to have my life. There's only really one thing that I suffer with that I would never wish on anyone - I've never been comfortable in my own skin. My appearance has always been an issue for me. Big, small, fat, thin - it was never good enough, and I was never happy. There was always SOMETHING that I wanted to change. If it wasn't my weight, it was the white spot on my tooth, the bump in my nose, the stubbiness of my fingers and toes. Even today I still struggle with these issues. Sometimes I wonder when I'm going to cut myself a break.
I have struggled with my weight ever since I was 14 years old - I've gained and lost 50+ pounds twice before, gone from as small as a size 4 to as large as a 14! But, I cannot ever seem to get off the rollercoaster - and now, I'm at the top of the hill once again, only this time I'm going for the REAL thrill. I've got 65+ pounds to lose this time. It seems like every time I lose, I gain back more than I weighed the last time I lose. I'm really afraid that if I don't lose the weight for GOOD and break the cycle, that I am going to end up miserable and unable to appreciate all of the good things that I DO have. And I'm afraid that I might die an early death if I don't nip this in the bud NOW.
Well, today is the day. Today is the day that I am going to start. Of course I have said this all before, but today I actually got on the scale. And now I'm really mad. I am mad at myself for ever letting my weight get so high. It's not like I have some kind of disease or that I am taking some kind of medication that made me get so heavy... it's just that I can't stop putting food in my fucking mouth!!! I eat because I'm bored, I eat because I'm stressed, I eat because food is put in front of me, and those habits all need to change, pronto.
A weight loss program wouldn't be complete without goals, so here's my shot at it. I'm going to list a range for weight, since my focus is actually going to be on body fat, and not weight.
Goal Fitness Stats
Weight: 120 - 140 lbs
BMI: 22
Body Fat%: 21%
